Updates

The show is open now. Here is the previously mentioned list of things I like:

• -There is a song called Slant Eyed Bitch. That makes me laugh.
• -No gun anymore( but now I make a rather realistic gun noise by wailing on a 1x4 with a huge rubber mallet.
• -The show is only 2 hours long approx.
• -Some of the music is kinda cool.
• -Supposedly I’m getting paid more for the added performances.
• -I don’t have to do any costume changes.
• -We have a bet going how many times we’ll start on time. So far we’re at zero. Opening night the 16 year old (who may be the death of me) showed up at 4 minutes to curtain. This isn’t necessarily something I like, but it makes me laugh. Sometimes all you can do is smile and shake your head.

Other updates:

• -I’ve already shoveled 10” of snow today… more on that later I’m sure.
• -I bartended at the Fitz last night for the 1st time in months…tips were very nice!
• -I got a whopping .20c raise at Marshall Field’s for being such an outstanding employee.
• -I talked to my manager about the incident with weird kid. She’s also concerned…luckily he’s still within the 90 day probationary period. Perhaps my days with weird kid are numbered.
• -Cross your fingers that Corleone will be performed in July. That means I’ll have job and a fun show to stage manage.
• -It’s still snowing.

Snapshots: My Job is Shitty

You may recall this from last fall. Well, I'm officially in the middle of tech for Snapshots: Life in the City. We open in 3 days. The good thing is that there is now sheet music. Although I'd like to point out that as of Tuesday, the cast was still learning music. And blocking. And lines. And choreography. I suppose maybe that's typical of musicals, but it makes it different when the cast is made up of 14 people (most under the age of 26) who don't like to show up on time. Its definitely going to be interesting show.

Also, I'm trying really hard not to get sucked into the negativity vortex that is the History Theatre, but I fear it may be too late. I'm starting to get really crabby at work. Here's a few reasons why: I have to fire a gun in the show. An 8mm semi automatic gun that fires blanks. I'm kinda excited about this, but nervous. I've never used a gun before. On top of that, the gun doesn't seem to be working properly. It always jams after one shot....I'm supposed to fire off 7. So I've never been able to do the whole sequence, which is frustrating. Additionally, there is only one person who seems really intent on helping me with this. Being completely understanding and answers all my questions and offers help. Is it the tech director? NO. Is the the stage manager? NO. Is it the props mater? NO. It's the master electrician. Last I checked guns weren't electircal, so it's not his job, but I'm grateful for his help anyway.
Reason #2 for crabbiness: Yesterday my SM asked me if I had paperwork for her. Usually I turn in paperwork on opening day since we're making changes up until then. But she said she just needed to make sure I had it and was doing it. Now some of you may not know about my anal tendencey of updating paperwork every 2 hours during shows. I kinda take pride in the fact that my paperwork is so organized and now my SM needs to check up on me??? This, by the way, is the SM who I have had to call to make sure she was awake for the morning matinees last year. Ok...now that I've ranted, I'm over it.
Well, I'm off to rehearsal. Next time I post the show will be open and perhaps I'll have a list of things I like about it!

Weird Kid story #2

I called Marshall Fields this weekend to get the schedule that came out on Friday. ( I went in on Friday to get it but it wasn't done yet which is a whole other annoyance). When I called, I asked to be transferred to men's because there are usually more people in that department than home...So if it was by some miracle busy the men's people would more likely answer. Big mistake....Huge! Weird kid answers. As soon as I heard his voice on the other end I knew that this was going to be a struggle. I knew that getting to him to look in the binder right next to phone and tell me if my name was on the schedule was going to be difficult. Here's how it went:
"Men's, can I help you?"
"Hi Jake it's Shannon O'Brien"
"Uuhhhh...huh?"
"I work with you."
"Oh yeah, hi"
"I was hoping you could tell me my schedule for the next week,"
SILENCE
"You know Jake the one that just came out."
"Which one that just came out?"
"It'll have the dates March 12-18 on it."
"Oh yeah, its out"
SILENCE. For Pete's sake...
"Am I on it?"
"For MArch 12th?"
"Well, I suppose Jake, for March 12th...and the rest of the week."
"Yeah, you're on it."
PAUSE. At this point I'm thinking about hanging up and trying the people in Home.
"When am I on it Jake?"
"You're on it 3 times."
"Could you tell me when those are?"
"Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday."
"Are there any times listed there Jake?"
"Oh yeah......."
Here is when Jake FINALLY gives me my schedule.

I knew it would be a struggle and I was right. Poor Jake. I think he has some processing issues.
That was another story brought to you by Weird Kid!

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

I hosted a dinner party last week and it was fairly successful. My friend Rae and I decided that we'd cook dinner for our friend Matt. Matt has hosted many dinner parties (including one that resulted in at least one case of alcohol poisoning) and we thought it was about time to return the favor. Since he bought cook books for his friends for Christmas, we knew we'd be able to find something. The party-goers included Matt, Jean, my mom, Rae's mom, Rae, and me. There was lots of wine, lots of food, and lot and LOTS of laughter.

The Menu:
-antipasto salad including garlic stuffed olives, marinated garbonzo beans, and mushrooms (among other things)
-Tuscan Tortellini Soup (soooo easy to make and it looks like it took hours)
-chicken parmigiana with seared polenta and braised artichokes (that were too lemony)
-gingered shortcake with dried figs and cherries with whipped cream
-pinot noir, sauvignon blanc, chardonnay, champagne

The food was all pretty tasty and none of it was too difficult to make. Rachels mom is drunk after 1/2 a glass of wine which made the night even better. Matt said, "You need to come to all of my dinner parties to make them more fun!" She was hilarious. While Rae and I were making dessert, she made Matt hold a "Napkin Folding Class.

Notice the bottles and wine glasses...so much drinking!

Other random pics....

Jeanie & Matt (I think that's what Matt called her when he was drunk at the bar later that night...that's right we still went to TSB night after all this!)

I look like shit because I'd been cooking for 4 hours at this point!

I have no idea what prompted this...Jean looks a bit confused too.

But, why not join it??? Drunk Michelle added a whole new element.

Well, that was the night...
We had a ton of fun and I can't wait to do it again!!!!

The New Kid aka Weird Kid

There’s a new kid at work….in the men’s department at Marshall Fields. As Jean once pointed out, “no one likes the new kid”. And boy is that ever true. One of my co-workers calls him “Our boy Jake!” And that’s just what he is…our boy Jake.

I was Jake’s first trainer, and I didn’t particularly enjoy those 5 hours of my life. But I thought perhaps it was because I wasn’t feeling well. It was one day early February and I had a horrible cold. I wanted to go home early, but instead, my manager comes up to me and says, “This is Jake. It’s his first day. You’ll be training him.” I took one look at Jake in his pleated khakis, wrinkled short-sleeved button-down shirt, and tie with fish on it (I was later informed that he purchased it at Savers and that it was Italian silk) and I thought, “Great!” During the day I found out that his lifelong dream (keep in mind he’s only 22) is to make Pet Cemetary 3. “Cuz they’re the best movies ever made right?” Sure Jake…sure. Jake also wondered if Marshall Field’s would be open to a few suggestions on how they should display things and remodel the store. Sure Jake. You’ve worked here for about 3 ½ hours now, I’m sure corporate will really appreciate your observations and suggestions. Jake also “wasn’t comfortable” opening the registers in the morning. He didn’t want that kind of pressure…never mind that opening and closing registers is a basic function of working at a retail store. Jake has never worked retail before.

Well since then everyone has gotten the impression that Jake is a bit odd. That’s an understatement. I love Goodwill shopping as much as the next guy, but I don’t run around saying that I buy everything there. Nor do I lurk about staring at people from behind the racks. I also don’t have 30,000 suggestion on how to make the retail world better even though I’ve worked retail for at least 6-7 years of my life. But tonight….tonight was the clincher.

I was closing with weird kid….my chosen name for him…and I just had a bad feeling. I went up to the guys in the Home department to whine. They asked, “how bad can he be?” Well a few minutes later, I found out how bad. I folding some Polo Khakis and weird kid comes up to me and says,
     “Ya know, you can always tell the people who have been shot.”
     “What???”
     “You can always tell the ones who have been shot.”
     “You mean like…with a gun?
     “Yeah. Something happens to them when they bleed. It changes them.”
     “Ummm….ok.”
That’s how bad he can be!!!!! He’s talking about people getting shot! That’s creepy. That’s weird! That’s why he’s weird kid. I went back and told the guys in Home. They were weirded out too. I think weird kid has gone a bit too far. But, then again, maybe he’s just living up to his name.

I'm Baaack!

I'm back in good old Minnesota. Luckily I missed the ridiculous cold snap here where the high didn't even reach ZERO on some days!!! But I was suffering through southern California's cold snap where the highs were only in the 50's. I was loving it but people were seriously wearing scarves and mittens and parkas!!! I mocked them all.

It was a very relaxing trip. Not as activity filled as last time, which was nice. I got to spend a lot of time cuddling on the couch with Henry and watching movies. I loved it!!! We played some pool, I dominated Henry with my dominoes skills, and I ate some really great "mom made" Japanese food. However, I'm sad to report that I have lost some of my skee ball skills. I definitely didn't bring my "A" game to Cali with me :(

We did manage to get off the couch a few times. We went to the LA Zoo.
Ummm...how adorable!______Sleepy Koala

This ram did sort of an Elvis lip thing.

I'm a Wallaby!

We also went to Universal Studios.

I made friends with a dinosaur.

And saw the plane wreck from War of the Worlds.

Henry also took me to the Corona del Mar Tide Pools.

The water was pretty cold, but I found lots of sea anenomes and crabs.

It was so pretty...kinda didn't want to leave!

Corona del Mar with the tide coming in.

It really was a a great relaxing trip.

Lots of good food, couch cuddling, and sites...can't wait to go back again!

The Discovery Channel in My Backyard

Last week I witnessed a little piece of nature. More specifically, I saw survival of the fittest up close and personal. While on the phone looking out at my backyard I noticed a large bird. Too big to be an ordinary sparrow, I thought it must be a hawk, but a small one. This lil guy probably got made fun of at hawk school cuz he's so small.
He was a shy hawk so I had trouble getting him to pose for the camera.
I think to myself, "gee usually hawks are up high so they can look for prey. I wonder why this one is on the ground?"

Then I see him do something similar to this:

Yup...he was on the ground because he was eating. I couldn't tell what he was eating, but he was ripping something apart and enjoying quite the snack. At one point something long and grisly was dangling from the side of his beak.
"Umm sir, you've got a little something hanging there...No, other side...almost gone...there you got it."

I decided to go outside very quietly to try to get a better picture of him. All I came up with was this:

As I started getting closer, he flew away, but then I was able to see what was left of his snack. Just a pile of feathers...no bones, hardly any blood. Just feathers. Gross.

He came back later in the afternoon and hung out in the backyard. I'm sure he was looking for more tasty morsels, but the birds in the area had learned their lesson. However, after watching all of this, I was inspired to buy these:

Cold Germs Can Kiss My Ass

I know that Jean says she never gets sick, but I'm pretty much the opposite. I get minor colds all the time. My friend Matt and I always know that we're both gonna get the "knock your ass out" cold in the the middle of December. It's a tradition we've had since high school. This year, mine happened one week before the holidays and I even went home early from work one night...something I don't think I've ever done before. But with rest and Zicam it went away quicker than normal (my colds usually last almost 2 weeks).

Well, yesterday I woke up with a sore throat. I knew it was coming back for more. The cold virus is back for revenge since I sent it packing so quickly last month. Well screw you cold! Screw the sore throat, coughing, stuffiness, and slight fever. The Zicam and DayQuil will take care of you again...I hope. But damn I don't wanna go to work tonight!

David want to follow me around with Lysol?

Mr. Green Jeans

Mr. Green Jeans is back...and I'm not talking about Captain Kangaroo's sidekick.

Not too many people will understand why I'm writing about Mr. Green Jeans. Let me give you a brief history: Mr. Green Jeans is the nickname of a man who used to (presumebaly still does) attend theatre performances at Winona State. He would always get his ticket early. He always wore green pants and a reddish orange jacket. He also has a toupee...i think...at least I hope its a toupee. At the end of the show while everyone is in the lobby, he would great the actors. If he really like your performance, he would give you some foreign currency. Somewhere I have a bill from Jamaica when he came to see Naked. Ryan do you have yours still? JMo doesn't really remember him.

Well last year I saw this man in the lobby at the history theatre...I couldn't believe it!!! Mr. Green Jeans is following me! I called JMo and told him....he couldn't really remember seeing Mr. Green Jeans at WSU shows recently. But, nonetheless Mr. Green Jeans makes the trip to Saint Paul. Over headset last night, my stage manager told me he was in the audience again...I think he's seen every show since I've been there. The people at the History Theatre call him Weird Pants Guy. He always sits in the front row, same seat. Gets there very early and examines the program, and he leaves quickly too. The box office ladies told me he always pays cash and won't give his name or his address.

So...who is Mr. Green Jeans? Where is he from? What other theatres does he go to? What does he do for work? And were did he get his amazingly green pants? Mr. Green Jeans, you are an enigma.

We either need to leave or get drunk...

That's what Matt said after about 15 minutes at the MMC last night. During the course of the evening we learned about strangers favorite positions, reaffirmed that slit means slut (and the clap/crabs), and that RAGGSberry Kamis can taste like vile cough syrup if not properly mixed.

The plan was to go for a few drinks and leave anyway, but after we walked in...We knew it would turn into more than that! The first person I see sitting on the rail (next to the only available seats) is none other than Slutzilla. That's right...She's baaaack! Let me just tell you how I excited I was to see here again. Sensei Matt, you missed it...Wish you could have met her. Now, Slutzilla on her own would have been enough, but she had a friend with her. A friend who was VERY loud, who thought she was flirting with the nasty men, and who walked like a stripper...Not that I have anything against strippers. Her friend's name is Mufasa. Ooooh say it again....Mufasa! This is because she had a lion mane on her head. A yellow highlight/black lowlight chunky streaked lion mane right on the top of her head that she kept fluffing both on and off the dance floor. Mufasa! She was pretty much going down on this older man on the dance floor. I vomited a little bit in my mouth. Sadly, it wasn't the first time that night that I was tempted to do so.

Another regular (lets just say he's danced with Rae a lot) was standing behind me at one point and I hear him yell; "Oh yeah....Reverse cowboy! I love that!" ummm gross. We don't need to talk about our favorite positions across the bar. Besides, I'm pretty sure you meant reverse cowGIRL unless there's something we don't know about you. I think we finally have a nickname for you sir!

Jean, some boring details for you: Elvis still sits prominently displayed on the monitors as he should be. However, I wish that we could have toasted Wilson Pickett during Mustang Sally, but perhaps Tony didn't know he died yesterday. Speaking of Tony, he learned that his antioxidents are low....What??? Do people under 50 need to worry about that? I guess so. More fruit (raspberry kamis) and vegetables (tobacco is a plant!) for Tony!