My mother is convinced that one reason I don't have a boyfriend is that I belch. Not alot, and not in mixed company. But at home, yes its true...I do. I blame Ryan and Jean for this habit. So last night my mom says to Matt, "I'm sure that's why she doesn't have a boyfriend" to which Matt very matter-of-factly replied, "No, that's not why." But he didn't expand on that. Well, apparently he knows the secret answer but isn't sharing.
Someone else made an interesting comment about my looks the other day. Now, I know I'm not drop dead gorgeous (also a great movie), but I wouldn't go so far as to say I'm unattractive. Well, this person I was talking to put it in an interesting way: "You're cute. You're even more cute because of your great personality (gee thanks). You're like Selma Blair.
She's cute, but she's not hot. Salma Hayek, now she's hot! 
So, you're Selma Blair, not Salma Hayek" Well thank you for that intersting observation. I guess I should be happy I'm Selma Blair and not Selma Bouvier! 
Of course another point to be made is that I'm often out with gay men. I don't know many straight guys...I mean even all the tech people at the theatre are women! So perhaps I need to find different venues...and Matt needs to stop hanging out with all the straight girls...then maybe he'll find a boyfriend too!
But I suppose I shouldn't complain. There's this great invisible man in my life. Tall, dark, and handsome...good listener...well educated...into art...very sexy. Too good to be true? Perhaps. Too cliche? Maybe. But a pretty good invisible man I must admit. If only he were here in person! I'm sure that's how everyone feels! Ok, that's enough of wallowing in my single depression...I'm sure there's some chocolate somewhere in this house!
1 comment:
Shannon,
As I was scratching my ass today, I was wondering this same question. Why don't I have a boyfriend (burrrrrrrpppppp)? The even more interesting aspect of this is--why are gay men (i.e. the kid and the David) saying, Jean, why don't you have a boyfriend? They are being sarcastic. If a gay doesn't know, then there is no hope for me. But, if my butt itches, dammit, why should I be a lady? "She's a lady...woh wohoh oh..."
Plus, I think that our personalities do answer this question. We're fun. We wear fuck me pumps, smoke cigs and drink long necks. That's what matters. We are lady enough to threaten to kick the shit out of some ho at a bar. In the long run, Selma Blair has a happy life and Selma Hayek gets droopy boobs. And Selma Bouvier gets long cancer and a lesbian sister.
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